Last week someone started a chat with me, asking a question. Her question was essentially, “You’ve talked about how to manifest what you want, but how do you stop manifesting what you don’t want?” Basically, how do you stop a negative manifestation from getting bigger, and how can you actually eliminate it altogether?
I realized that this was a bit of a gap in what I’ve written about here. I’ve discussed how your negative manifestations can actually help you, but not how to actually, you know, stop manifesting them. 🙂
Honestly the process isn’t all that different, but I understand why there might be some confusion. So, I hope to clear that up today.
At the end of this post, I’ll give you a surprisingly simple tool that has the power to turn around any negative manifestation.
How a Negative Manifestation Happens in the First Place
Let’s start at the beginning. You’re working on a big goal of yours. We’re just going to assume this is a next level goal, because otherwise you probably wouldn’t be at risk of too many negative manifestations.
So how does a negative manifestation get started, then?
Kickback from Your Goal
Any time you focus on a goal, you are moving energy towards that goal. But, if your subconscious structures don’t support that goal, then you will experience resistance. Hopefully this is basic by this point, but if it seems new, then I recommend going back and reading the subconscious structures post.
So, it is very common that when you focus on a goal, you’re going to get a bit of kickback from it. The bigger the goal—i.e., the less your current subconscious structures support that goal—the bigger the kickback. You may have heard in Spiritual Freedom Support Call #23 that I actually advised someone to let up on a goal a bit, because the kickback from it was so severe that it was really interfering with her life.
When an airplane attains cruising altitude, it lifts its landing gear, because otherwise it generates too much drag on the plane, requiring more thrust to move it forward. This is somewhat like your goal. When you start focusing on it, that focus generates thrust, which has the potential to move you forward. But you also have current resistance (drag), which is pulling you back at the same time. If you don’t reduce that drag, then it is going to hurt, quite a bit, and require more forward momentum to make any progress.
Remember that the greater the forward momentum, the greater the drag as well, which is why big goals hurt so much. Have you ever stuck your hand out the open window of a moving car? The faster the car is moving, the greater the drag on your hand. That’s resistance in a nutshell.
So the resistance is inevitable. It’s a natural part of the process, which I’ve discussed before. It’s not to be feared. However, you must know how to deal with it appropriately. Using the above metaphor, you must learn how to reduce the drag on your goal.
When this resistance arises, you have a basic choice: whether to give it focus and reaction or not. Recall from our podcast on how to overcome limiting beliefs that the two ingredients to grow any manifestation, positive or negative, is focus plus reaction. When these two elements are present, the energy of that manifestation grows. When they are absent, it decreases.
It’s that simple. And it applies not only to your resistant thoughts, but to all thoughts. If you give it focus and emotional reaction, you make it grow. If you do not, then you diminish it.
When You React
Let’s say you run into a particularly bad bit of resistance, and you give it your focus and reaction. What happens?
It grows, of course. And as I teach in The Art of Reality Creation, as a manifestation grows, it becomes more and more dense—more and more crystalized within outer reality.
Now remember that even just the negative thought itself is a negative manifestation. It may not be in outer reality yet, but there is no differentiation to the Universe. It is all the same.
A Downward Spiral
So as you react, again and again, you give it a bit more energy, and a bit more energy, and a bit more energy. And every time you give it energy, you are allowing it to grow bigger and bigger in your reality.
Now the awful thing is that as it grows bigger, not only does it show up in bigger and bigger ways, but it elicits greater and greater reactions from you. And so it is easier and easier to give it your focus and reaction, and your reaction will be more and more intense. That’s why negative manifestations tend to grow exponentially once they start. The bigger they get, the more you react, and the more you react, the bigger they get.
Stopping a Negative Manifestation
So that’s how a negative manifestation comes about. You start with a resistant thought, you react to it over and over again, and pretty soon it grows into a negative manifestation that is rooted in outer reality.
But, how do you stop it? Once it is really out of control, how do you end that downward spiral?
Ignoring the Problem
One common approach that people take is to ignore the negative manifestation. But, this is problematic for a few reasons:
First is that by the time things get really critical, it is almost impossible to just ignore it and focus elsewhere. It will keep stealing your focus back, again and again, and every time it is successful, you’ve reacted to it yet again.
But secondly, if you have a goal which has triggered this negative manifestation, then it will continue to trigger it, until you resolve that negative manifestation. You could drop the goal temporarily, but I highly discourage that in almost all circumstances, unless you have jumped to far too big of a goal. I’ll discuss below the possibility of dropping the goal.
So for example, if you have a money goal, which is triggering a poverty manifestation, then you’re going to keep getting that negative manifestation until you release it. If you try to just ignore it, then how are you going to drop the money goal? Usually, it’s going to make you want that money goal even more, and even become desperate for it. It would take intense discipline to actually stop focusing on the money goal for a while to allow the momentum of the poverty manifestation to die down.
More likely, it’ll fester in the back of your mind. You’ll say you’re ignoring it, but it’s always there, just beneath the surface. There’s a constant low-level anxiety that just won’t go away, because you won’t process it.
In the case of a serious negative manifestation, I recommend a process I call decompression, in analogy to the process divers undergo when coming back to the surface after a deep dive. If they ascend too quickly, the quick change in pressure can actually make them sick. So it is a slow, controlled ascent where the pressure is gradually decreased.
It is essentially to spend some time, as much as is necessary, just resting in the zero state whenever that negative manifestation comes to mind or presents itself in outer reality. I have done this over a period of several days before when I’ve been careless with my focus and gotten myself into a downward spiral of anxiety or fear.
In that time, I recommend not focusing on the goal at all. If you do, then it should be very light. However, this decompression time is focused on healing from that negative manifestation. If you focus on the goal, you are just going to add to the pressure again.
This isn’t necessary all the time, but definitely useful with intense resistance. It’s a complete shutdown of all focus in relation to the goal, and a complete removal of all reaction to that negative manifestation.
You’ll know when you’re out of it, because you’ll feel lighter and freer. You can focus a bit on the goal without immediately triggering major resistance.
Non-Reaction Starves the Negative Manifestation
Even with negative manifestations that don’t require a decompression time, you still want to give it non-reaction any time it comes up. Remember that reaction feeds it, and non-reaction starves it. So though it might come up frequently at first, if you keep giving it non-reaction, it will come up less and less frequently.
When you practice non-attachment, it can really help you to stop reacting to these negative manifestations. You can’t react to what you don’t believe. The moment you see through the illusion that your ego has constructed is the very moment it stops having control over you.
That’s very hard for most people, but it does take practice. This stuff isn’t so easy at first. And, unfortunately there is no shortcut.
Keep Choosing the Goal
The most important part of this process is that you continue to choose the goal no matter what. It’s only by choosing the goal, in the face of the resistance, over and over again, that creative tension is generated and your subconscious structures can be quickly changed.
This applies, of course, unless you are going through the decompression process, then you can let it go for a few days. But even with that, you are focusing on the goal, recovering from the kickback via decompression, focusing on the goal, recovering from the kickback, etc, until the severity isn’t so debilitating and you can give the goal more of your focus.
But, the goal will feel like a stretch until it is in reach. That is normal, and to be expected. You have to get comfortable with discomfort in order to make major changes in your subconscious structures.
When to Drop Your Vision of the Goal
As I mentioned above, there may be a very few situations in which you should drop the goal. It is extraordinarily rare, though, and I would never make a habit of it. This should be a last resort.
However, sometimes when people are choosing their first goal to manifest with the law of attraction, they will go way out of their comfort zone. Why this is depends on the individual, but some possible reasons are:
- They underestimate the power of resistance
- They are so desperate that they think only a massive goal can make them happy
- They really don’t take the process seriously
Whatever the reason, some people fall to the temptation of choosing far too big of a goal. I’m all for dreaming big, but you generally have to take steps towards that dream, not achieve it all in one big step. It’s great to set an ultimate level goal, but also set a shorter-term vision that can lead to that ultimate level goal.
So how do you know if you should drop your goal and reduce it to something smaller? Generally you’ll know, because the resistance is just overwhelming you. If every time you think of the goal, you experience massive resistance that you can’t find your way out of, then the goal may very well be too big.
Again, it is better to choose a manageable goal from the start, than to have to drop an unmanageable goal later on. Take the process of choosing your goal seriously, and take into account the 3 essential elements to any successful manifestation: it should be inspiring, believable, and challenging. Without all of these, it’s probably not going to work.
One Tool to Turn Around Any Negative Manifestation
At the beginning of this post, I promised I would share a tool that could turn around any negative manifestation to the positive. Now’s the time to do so. 🙂
This tool doesn’t replace any of the above. An understanding of everything I discussed in this post will help you to use this tool even more effectively. In particular, decompression should come prior to using this tool, but it can help you to get out of that stage more quickly.
It comes in the form of a simple question. I’ve been using this question lately with some negative manifestations, and it’s worked wonders.
The question is: “What is it I want out of this situation?”
The problem is that when you have a negative manifestation, especially one that is taking all of your focus, you are focused solely on getting rid of that negative manifestation. However, that focus will only hold it in existence.
The above question will help you to redirect your focus to what you really want. Instead of focusing on the negative manifestation and what problems it is creating for you, you are turning your focus to the solution.
- If you have issues with money, it’s not that you want to get rid of those issues, it’s that you want more money.
- If you are having problems with your partner, it’s not that you want to get rid of those problems, it’s that you want a happy relationship.
- If you are sick, it’s not that you want to get rid of the sickness, it’s that you want health.
Once your focus is directed to what you want out of the situation, then you are in a better position to create that in your life. However, you cannot create a negative. You cannot create the absence of money issues, relationship problems, or sickness. You can only create the presence of something else that will replace those things.
There is a followup statement, which goes: “I choose to have _____.”
Insert the answer to the question into the blank above, and use it as your affirmation.
- “I want more money” becomes: “I choose to have more money.”
- “I want a happy relationship” becomes: “I choose to have a happy relationship.”
- “I want health” becomes: “I choose to have health” (or “I choose to be healthy”).
Feel free to alter the statement to make sense for your particular desire. Just be sure it starts with “I choose ….”
This statement will allow you to deliberately choose your goal. It will move this desire from a want to a choice that you make as a deliberate creator. Creators don’t want: they choose, and then they achieve.
[bctt tweet=”Creators don’t want: they choose, and then they achieve.”]
Once you make that deliberate choice, day-after-day, your energy will flow in that new direction, and you will start to create that in your life, instead of the problem.
An Example in My Own Life
Recently I had some negative manifestations. One particular one was where there were some unforeseen delays in getting my intro for Co-Create Your Life. I wanted it to be done by last Saturday, because I release the podcast on Saturdays. However, there was delay-after-delay, and I was quickly getting frustrated.
So I decided to use this tool. I asked myself, “What is it I want out of this situation?” And my answer was, “I want my intro to be amazing, and perfect for my podcast. I also want it to be delivered quickly.” Then I chose to have these things.
Almost immediately, things started working out. After not too long, I had the intro, and was finally able to release the podcast.
It wasn’t always easy, but every time I was tempted to complain about the situation, I just repeated the above process. I gradually felt better and better about it, and I just knew it would work out. And, of course, it did.
So, I invite you to try out this tool for yourself, and see if it helps you to stop your negative manifestations and create what you really want.
How About You?
Now it’s your turn. What negative manifestations are you experiencing in your life right now? How can you apply the above techniques to turn your focus to creating the positive? Let me know your thoughts in the comments.